Equanimity quote

Simple Life quote

Help others and follow dreams quote

written 02/08/09

Dharma

Each morning when I think of you
I awake with a smile
I jump out of bed, pick you up
And hug you for a while

You climb down my top
And nestle into my chest
With your little head poking out
There you happily rest

When I go out for the day
I'm excited to come home and see you
I can tell the feeling's mutual
When you frantically run over to me
Licking me like crazy

And you must really love Robbie too
With the way you let him constantly play with you
He makes you pull silly faces
And puts you in funny (safe) positions
And it never phases you a bit
You just close your eyes and drift off into it

And when I notice you curled up safely in his hand
While you both fell asleep together on the couch each night
I watch and smile
As I think it's truly a beautiful sight

Just like me
You love to eat
And when you smell food in the kitchen
You run in and sit by my feet
Waiting for your healthy treat

And when I give you something to munch on
Gees you're funny to watch
As you cantor down the hallway
With this piece of food hanging out of your mouth
While heading off to eat it in one of your 'safe' places in the house

When someone comes to visit
You graciously greet them
With plenty of kisses
And a wag of your tail
To you, they're like a new friend

I refuse to keep you locked up in a cage
So the sun room became your room
Although you prefer to be with us most of the time
And Obviously we didn't mind

When it's cold you make yourself comfy amongst the layers of the spare doona on the couch
Sometimes, shivering myself as I Iay in bed, I lie there with a smirk on my face
Thinking how spoilt you are
But I don't mind as long as you are warm and safe

You First fell ill when you were about 5 months old
I took you to the vet
She suggested to euthanise you
But I would have no part in it
As I believed you would pull through

I wrapped you in a towel
And for 6 days I nursed you in my arms
Medicating you and softly, singing mantras in your ear
Keeping you safe from harm

Every so often,
Your weary head would raise to look up at me
This is what began our bond that we shared
You started to completely trust me
As you could see how much I cared

The vet gave you two days to live
But you survived another one and a half years
And even though you're not always well
You know that love and support for you are always here

Some people might think
''gees, she's only a rat!''
But little Dharma girl
You are as much family to me
As a dog or cat would be

Naming you Dharma was perfectly suited to you
You are as kind spirited as the Buddha teachings themselves
Giving nothing but loyalty, friendship and unconditional love
You truly belong in an angelic realm up above

If i listened to the vet
I wouldve missed out on all the laughs you give me
And our friendship we share so honestly

Dharma, my heart feels completely open With you
Thankyou little rattie
I love you...

written 8/8/09

Illusion quote

Written june 2009

Peace within the pain

I wrote this when i laid on the couch for 2wks with spinal pain...

Feeling peace within the pain.

Sounds odd.

Yet somehow, during the unpleasant feelings, I can ''just be'' at one. I can... ''just be''.

At times a part of me enjoys when I feel quite unwell. For it's these times, I can lay there and appreciate the moment that is now.
I could venture into the past and think ''I should've done this'' or ''not have done that''. But I realise these thoughts will only hinder, not help me.


I could fantasise about the future.

All the things I ''need'' and ''want'' to do, but when I'm in this state, I am often too lazy to put those thoughts in motion. When I do, I tend to grasp at the future events, making myself feel anxious and eager to get back out there to try and fulfill my arranged plans, hoping to receive the desired outcome.
I have learnt in my life that plans often don't go the way they were supposed too. I didn't plan to have some degree of disability after an un-necessary surgery procedure. I could shower myself properly the morning I went into hospital, that afternoon onwards I couldn't.

Gradually, using my hands less due to chronic unrelenting pain, I now have hands that a virtually just for show.
As a young, extroverted girl who loved the independence, social interactions and just to be able to dance, run, enjoy a casual stroll and get up and do anything and go anywhere, has, in one fowl swoop been taken from me somewhat. Though thankfully, I am not completely dependent and am forever grateful and feel blessed to still have the chance to dream!

When I ''relax'' on the couch, in the agony of my physical pain, theres no need for nostalgia. It is past and it wont help me now!

Thinking of what may lie ahead, may never come.
I can now feel at peace, just being here.
I don't have to push myself to do this and do that.

Even when I enjoy my activities, my body constantly reminds me that I have a tumour. The flat mate, my mother named ''Tim'', is persistant in continuing to live with me, even though, everyone wants him to move out!
Even though, I can never seem to escape him, Its so nice not having to face ''the world outside'' sometimes.
I can just lay here and read, listen to some pleasing music, watch a funny movie, or express myself through writing. All the while having nutritious tasty meals served to me, to satisfy my healthy appetite, from someone who loves me.

When the pain's quite severe, its easy to start going over the ''what ifs''. ''what if'' I'm getting worse, ''what if'' this is the last time I'll walk, ''what if '' I die young, ''WHAT IF'', ''WHAT IF''... I am now learning to replace these thoughts with yeah, well, ''what if'' these things happen? Yes it would make things harder, no I don't want to suffer anymore, but for whatever reason, I've been given a life with a strong amount of suffering, and I've learnt to deal with that the best way I can.
When I feel angry, frustrated, sad etc, sometimes I go with it. Sometimes I hide behind some codeine, to help take the edge off, but to also give me that stoned sleepy feeling, so I can escape from this life, for a few hours. However, Other times, I realise the emptiness in it all.

I'm intelligent enough, to know the existence in things to be true are often false, including the reflection I see in the mirror. Although, being aware of it intellectually and feeling it as a sense are quite different. If we could all ''feel'' the emptiness and impermanence, we would all be in a state of equality. Nothing would bother us or hurt us any more.

Sometimes I feel this peace, when the pain is quite severe.

I fought the changes for nine years, though, its been more intense the last three and a half. Finally, I have stopped rebelling and fighting the deterioration of my body. I am now more accepting and embracing as there is nothing more I feel I can do.

I am aware there's a chance I could continue to decline. Am i being negative? no. Just realistic.

However, it doesn't make a thought like that any easier, at any age, but i think even more so, when your're young. Especially, socialising with others that are of similar age, with no apparent health problems... Yet.
Although, I can no longer waste energy on comparing myself to my friends or other young people, wishing for the ''old me'' to return, watching others, thinking, ''I could do that once'', or ''I used to take that for granted, like you do now'' or ''something so simple to you, which used to be for me, isn't so simple now'' etc, etc.

I need to realise, that everything passes, including who I used to be.

I've now had my time to grieve, and it is now time to let go and move on. I have to learn to love myself for I am now, then I can enjoy the present quality of my life.

After all, this life is impermanent, myself, loved ones and all surroundings. So I can choose to flow with it, bringing some relief or I can resist, bringing further suffering, until I reach the culmination of this life.
I am fortunate in the sense, that ive been given the opportunity, to ponder over my own mortality. Because we all know that all of us will depart at some point, but do we really feel it?

Most of us go to bed assuming we will awake tomorrow. But where is that guarantee?

There are no guarantees, the suns rays will shine through our bedroom window, to let us know, it's the birth of a new day. Or to hear the birds greet each other in a melodious manner. There are no guarantees with anything.

Everything is unstable.

Everything is changing.

So once again, I am glad to be able to express my deep inner thoughts and feelings, and that I have at least one participating member on my right hand (my thumb) to be able to type out my emotions through these words.
I would like to finish by saying, despite any deterioration, i do believe i have the chance and opportunity to reverse the situation and heal myself!

Being quite the determined, stubborn and strong minded person that i am, has actually worked in my favour. It's given me the strength and patience i need to never give in or give up! All hope isn't lost!
I will now sit back into my ''luxury lounge'' and enjoy a nice cup of tea and feel... the peace within the pain.

Written by Harmony
Age 28
Thursday 14/08/08

Mind

I was in an observant mood while i was out one day sitting by the ocean at a local beach. I was looking at all the people around analyzing everyone and observing the nature of life and and how it changes.

Most of us deny the impermanence of things, or if we don't,we still often feel "it won't happen to us" whatever that may be. Anyway, it was interesting watching people, and i had the urge to write something. Without pen or paper, i was glad i had my trusty mobile with me, and i went a texting away...


The mud is thick.
Stuck in it's reluctance to move.
Benign muck.

Thoughts race, going round and round like a washing machine.
It wounds the nerves. They wont subside.
Leaving me to feel physically ill.

Does any of this make sense?
Who knows?
In this crazy world, full of hazy minds, all in a daze.

Take off your rose coloured glasses and look around this sleepy town of parochial minds and one eyed views.
It's you who long for something new, in the misconception of our surrounds.
The grasping of what you see to be untrue, you fool!

The once human form, now transformed into a gluttonous seagull, through the ignorance which was possessed.

Trying to stay afloat in a canoe on the water, as the unsteadiness of the sea is unpredictable.
The ocean topples it over, with no control, you find yourself being dragged helplessly down to the realm below.
The naraks are waiting with hot iron swords, the ghosts with bellies so big and hungry, but with a pin hole for a mouth, no food can be swallowed.

Trying to subdue the mind and stray away from disturbing thoughts and erroneous views.
Feeling the need to escape from what one thinks is reality.

I want to put on my wings and fly away, leaving this body of constriction behind me,
while drifting off in my dreamland of mysticism.

Although, am i already in a dream?

Do i need to be awakened from this sleepy mind of delusions?
Is this all just an illusion?

Things arent always as they appear.
Look beyond and you may see the truth.

Changeable in its nature, this mind we like to call our own.
But how can we, when we have no control?

age 27
Written SUNDAY 26/01/2008

SAMSARA

The karmic wheel spins again, like waiting for a number on the roulette table, which realm of samsara, will we take birth in this time?
From beginningless times, we’ve had to endure the suffering of countless rebirths and experience all kinds of karma, because we cannot control our mental afflictions of desire, attachment and ignorance.

We are blessed to be born as humans, rather then a hell being, or in the animal realm of ‘eat or be eaten’, but being born into a place of leisure and opportunity, do we use our time wisely?

We’re too concerned with money, sex and power!
These are the most important things to have, or are they?

We work all day, sleep all night and strive to have material possessions. This is what success is based on. But what is success really?

When we pass on from this life, will working hard all our life, until one is sick or old and having all the latest gadgets (that we’re constantly bombarded with by big corporations, that don’t care, who or what they destroy, because they are fueled by their own greed) really mean anything in the end? Is this real success?
Living a simple life and showing love and compassion to all beings, wouldn’t this be considered true success?

Actually making a difference in the world, by bringing love into the hearts of people and animals and respecting our land.

After all, it’s mother earth that supplies us with all our needs and resources, and we show our appreciation, by treating it, like it’s our own personal toilet! People seem to be more concerned with trivial things, such as their vanity or the pain in their little toe, rather than the important things going on in the world.
When we pass on from this life, we leave all our loved ones behind and our possessions, so why have attachment?
Love unconditionally, give generously without expectations.

For it is not us who dies, just the form we take on in this life. When we leave this life, who we are now, will NEVER be here again. We will never come back as the person we’re known to others today. We will be someone entirely different.
However, our mental continuum will carry on to take our next rebirth and depending on how we behave, will determine, how our next life will be and what form we take on.

We are in control of what happens to us, through our thoughts and actions. Karma will continue to exist while we live with cravings and attachment to things, including our own self cherishing (one who cherishes the self, cannot be trusted) The way we see ourselves, the ‘I’, that we so desperately grasp on too, doesn’t really exist, the way we perceive it.
We are but merely a name, that exists for only a certain amount of time.

Being born as a human, we have accumulated much merit. To be beautiful one has created much patience. From ethics comes happiness, joyous effort comes strength and generousity comes resources.

Another thing i'd like to say, is why do we hold on to the past? Would you go through yesterday’s garbage to make tonight’s meal?

And fantasising about the future can bring disappointment, when things don’t go our way.
As John Lennon said “Life is what happens to you, while you’re busy making other plans”

So live in the now and follow a virtuous path.

Karma is expantial No matter how small the deed (good or bad).
It’s like a seed that’s planted and grows into a huge tree, with many branches. Once planted, nothing can stop the seed, unless other factors come into play and prevent that from happening.
For eg. doing a negative action, will ripen, unless purified.

Search for happiness within, because external conditions or in another term, samsaric pleasures, will only bring temporary happiness.

When suffering from mental anguish or physical pain, know that it will pass, nothing is permanent. I have had my own experiences with this. If one is going through this, know that it will be temporary, no matter how permanent it may seem at the time.

Everything is transient.

Have faith in two of the 4 noble truths which is “there is a cause to suffering and there is cessation of suffering.”

I know, that by feeling depressed, frustrated or angry, will only create more negative karma for myself, therefore, more suffering.

Instead, by helping other’s, helps relieve one’s own pain, because it takes the focus off one’s self. It also teaches us kindness and brings much merit.

If someone behaves badly to another being, this shows a lack of inner contentment. Instead of retaliating in the same manner, and seeing the person as inherently bad or as an enemy, use this person to help develop patience and wisdom.
Practice equanimity to all beings.

All our experiences we go through, are due to our own karmic conditions, ripening at that particular time. Nothing can happen to us, unless we have created the cause to do so.
So stay positive with an open mind, show love and compassion, be generous and follow the path of morality.

Love and blessings

Written 17/03/07

May you appreciate...

I was inspired to write this poem, after i witnessed something that i found very upsetting.I thought about the preciousness of life and the fragility of it. As i pondered over my many thoughts, i was admiring the beauty of nature, as i stood there and looked out over the 1000 acres of lush greenery, that surrounded me. And thought about how much we can learn from it...

may your days be filled with sunshine
and your nights with tw inkling stars
may you wake up everyday and value who you are.

may you have the chance to go out bush and find some tranquil time
to be away from the stresses of life and find peace within your mind
and to wake up to the soulful tunes of birds singing a happy song
and hear them call out to their relatives for them to merry-ly sing along

and may you have the chance to walk along the beach
while the ocean air cleanses your aura as the sand massages your feet
and as you stand there looking out to sea
with your skin being tickled by the gentle breeze
may you appreciate the abundant life and activity
that live beneath the ocean sheathe
and as you leave the beach may you feel refreshed and revived
after breathing in the fresh, cleansing air and you feel great to be alive

and may you appreciate the vibrant beauty of a flower as it blooms
and it's colours and smell radiate your senses and brings a smile when feeling gloom
and to enjoy the beauty of a dew drop as it drips upon a leaf
and glistens in the sunlight until it evaporates in the heat

and when going to bed at night feeling warm and cosy beneath the sheets
may you be thankful you're not living on the streets
and that you have no fear and are able to sleep

and may you give compassion to all living beings
whether an ant or human they all have feelings

to give love without wrong expectations is the true meaning of the word
and to live without judgements these are just some of our learning curves

and to acknowledge that desire is the key to all suffering
so before acting upon it think if there's anyone you'll be harming

and may you appreciate having intelligence and being physically and mentally able
to enjoy the beauty around us and to be living in a country that's relatively stable

and may you appreciate the warmth of a smile that appears on someone's face
either given or received is something that can never be taken or erased

so forget about the trivial things in life, for at any moment, can come death
it's as close as being on the other side of a wall
after the mere cessation of breath

and try not to be despondant about the negativities in life
and things that can't be changed
acknowledge the beauty within one's self and what mother nature has to offer
and by giving to the less fortunate helps to ease one's own pain

and may you always have a life that's filled with PEACE, LOVE, and meee (HARMONY)

written sep/06
age 26